Posts Tagged ‘Spring’

Easter, regardless of your religious choices, is synonymous with rebirth and resurrection. It’s a time of year where the leaves return to the trees, the warmth returns to the air and “life, uh, finds a way” to begin anew.

In case you don’t catch my meaning: a lot of animals are banging in the forest.

So, in true Easter fashion I’ve decided to use this time of year to initiate a rebirth of my own. Along with my initiative to conquer what remains of my depression, I look to conquer the monster known as weight loss and do battle with the demon of “starting a new career at 30”. I can tell you from previous experience in life that this will quite possibly be the hardest thing I’ve ever done. I am king of not following through, master of giving up and the fabled hero of abandoning things after a week.

Okay, so that last one doesn’t really roll off the tongue but it’s accurate and that’s all that matters.

So much like my very first blog post, I’m using this as a sort of proof of accountability. I’ve written out what I want to accomplish in a public forum so that everyone who reads this has full permission to do their best Johnny Cage impression to my naughty bits if I don’t get this crap together.

Some of you may be reading this wondering why this is such a big deal and thinking why I need to go to such an extreme to motivate myself to just simply change my lifestyle. Let me answer those thoughts with a question about yourself. Is there a habit or a bit of your personality that defines you? Something so ingrained within you that it would take constant vigilance to completely change? That’s what I’m doing. Attempting to change 30 years of ingrained to the core habits and practices.

I mentioned in that first blog post that I’m a lazy excuse maker and how that needs to change. To do that I need to challenge myself and step outside of this soft and warm comfort zone that I’m so afraid to leave. So many things are accomplished when you strive to be better and this world isn’t run by people who want to coast by, resting on their laurels all day long. So I need to be more of a “go-getter”, someone with drive and determination to get shit done!

Now, this may sound like I’m ready to just blast off and kick this thing’s ass but in all honesty l admit that I’m scared to death. The ghost of failure, disappointment and backsliding all hang over my head and I’ll be even more honest and say that I’m not sure I can do this at all. Looking back on my life and seeing the path of failure and complacency I’ve carved out for myself doesn’t give me a whole lot of hope for my future. At the same time, I can use that to motivate myself, to tell myself that it doesn’t have to be like that anymore and only I can be the one to change all that. So I don’t know if there are any other readers out there like me, craving change and desiring a better life but all it takes is confidence and determination. The one thing you can’t do is give up. I know I’m going to fall on my face a few times but I can’t give up.

When The Doctor faced down all of his enemies on Trenzalore for all those years, did he give up?

When that job went south for the millionth time and Reavers were on their tail, did Mal and his crew give up?

When The Governor cut Rick’s hand off in the middle of a zombie apocalypse (Yes, TV Show fans, that happened in the comics) did he give up?

When Harry Blackstone Copperfield Dresden was battling the entire Red Court of Vampires at Chichen Itza to save his daughter and Susan (spoilers), did he back down?

The answer to all of this is obviously no but I prefer a heartier OH HELL NO!

 

So let’s see if I can be like all of these heroic fictional characters I admire so much and if you want to change like me I know we can do it.